Any minister worth his salt will tell you THE greatest blessing he has been given… after salvation… is his wife. Without a supportive, godly, God called wife… NO minister can or will be successful in ministry. Let me go further, he will not STAY IN ministry. At the same time, the Pastor’s Wife goes through much more than the pastor will. Let me explain…
Note: My thoughts were motivated by this article.
Were it not for God using my wife in my life through 25 years of ministry in several congregations, I would not be in ministry now. I would have bailed out long ago. Not only that, I would probably be in a straight-jacket padded room somewhere (Kind of tongue in cheek, but not far off!). Were it not for her giving me warnings and encouragements, I’d have blown things up many more times than I did. There is no more important person on this earth to me than my wife Pam… bar none!
She has gone through many more difficulty and struggles than I have. As I told her often, “If you didn’t do what you do… I couldn’t do what I do.” She took care of the kids… got them ready and brought them to church, she freed me up to visit and go to meetings, she gave me freedom to study, she supported me in my education, she walked me through many dark days… nights… times… and troubles as a pastor. Her hardships and difficulties are much more significant than anything I’ve experienced.
And what did she get? Not much. All the “Cool people” at church kept her at arm’s length. People didn’t include her in things many others were included in. She had to overhear people trashing her husband… pretend she didn’t hear them… and love them anyway (That’s her nature!). She had many acquaintances at church, tried to make friends, but it just didn’t happen (I thank God she was able to make some good friends who weren’t members of the congregation). Yet no one could have a better, more loving, and faithful friend than my wife!
There is no other person on earth a minister ought to thank God for than the wife given who supports him! Why? Because I’ve seen the other side too. Wives who didn’t want to be a minister’s wife… those who hurt the minister’s ministry… the ones who cost ministers because of their attitude, conduct, and speech. So yes, I thank God Almighty for the wife He gave me because Pam never did any of those things!
Suggestion… No, I IMPLORE YOU: Find ways to encourage the minister’s wife. Call them just to talk. Be patient because they’ve been wounded by “spies” several times. Ask her out to lunch AND DON’T TALK ABOUT CHURCH! Include her in non church related events. Pray for her. Send her a hand written note or card (NOT an email or text. Written words mean much more). Defend her AND her husband… too many take the other position.
I could go on, but I think you get the idea.
God, thank you for calling Pam to be a minister’s wife and the way you have blessed me through her.